Stuck this Christmas
by casfics
Summary: It is a shift like any other, with all the chaos of Boxing Day. Holby is at its peak busiest time and the department fast runs out of essentials. Dr Gardner sends two of her medics to go and search for equipment, with interesting consequences.


**_Christmas Etica fic bc I still have all the feels from the trailer!_**

 ** _Hope you like - please do let me know what you think._**

 ** _(A/N: Some religious controversy, just a heads up in case anyone's sensitive to that!)_**

'Not budging.' She collapses against the heavy wooden frame in defeat. ' _Shit_.'

Alicia's foot connects with the door several more times, repeatedly, until common sense prevails. She gives it one last boot for good measure.

'Okay, stop it now, stop it!' Ethan finally pipes up, looking up from the floor. 'It won't open, will it?'

'Probably not while you're so hell-bent on sitting on your backside watching me.' She replies, wiping the thin layer of perspiration from her brow with the back of a hand.

He closes the tatty paperback novel he's found, casting it aside, and readjusts his glasses further up his face. As he stands up, he begins to realise why she'd tried to break out. There is a chilly draft in the cellar. Deep down, he knows the identity of the smell could be anything. It was the hospital's old store cupboard, after all. That, in itself, meant it was worth every bit of effort to try and escape.

Alicia is bored and doesn't do bored well. The silence is dangerous, because it means only two things. Either she is thinking, or angry. Neither is good.

'Deck the halls with boughs of holly, fa-la-la-la-la—' She begins to sing with gusto, loudly and out of tune.

'You're wise sticking to the day job.' He mutters.

'Ethan, you've got about as much charm as a dead slug, you know that?'

'How kind you are,' He comments drily, pacing around the room.

By familiarising himself with the "cage", as Alicia had ironically termed it on their initial way down to collect larger cannulas, he hoped to feel slightly more at ease. Of course, it wasn't ideal that they were stuck, but perhaps they could find something - a prop - that could aid them in breaking free.

'What on earth possessed you to shut the door?' She asks.

'I didn't, that was you!' He protests, stopping in his search and turning around.

'You were definitely last in, because I went straight for the box.' She tells him.

'I would never have intentionally shut it, I'm not completely stupid.'

Alicia laughs in response, shutting her eyes and dragging her hands down her face in despair.

'Of course, you probably think differently—'

'Give it a rest, Ethan, Christ! I'm laughing at the situation, not you. We've not had a conversation in months and here we are, locked in this bloody room.' She pauses. 'Obviously you're a very clever man, I would never dispute that.'

He glowers with contempt, taking a seat against the dusty wall to mull over her words. A few seconds passed in silence. 'Do you definitely not have your phone in your scrubs pocket?'

'It's in my locker.' She sighs. 'And yours?'

He is irritated and doesn't answer the question, plunging them into yet another silence.

'They'll come and find us, won't they? Two doctors going missing together, it's a little...' Alicia says, full of hope, pausing when she sees his reproachful look. 'Not like that, of course. Someone will think something is amiss, they're bound to.'

He scoffs loudly. 'ED on Boxing Day night. Course, they've probably sent the search party already. Let's expect them any minute now.'

She breaks into a little sob, knitting her arms across her chest to preserve heat, and buries her head in her knees. Ethan watches out the corner of his eye, words starting to spill out of nowhere.

'Or, alternatively, they'll arrive at the insinuation I took from your words and will think nothing of it. It's those two again, having a moment. Everyone knows the past. Maybe they'll think, _if_ they do think at all, that we're off shift now. Or on break. Or-'

She is crying now, and instead of feeling responsible, he feels somewhat satiated.

He knows it's unfair, playing on her naivety and fuelling the fire, but he can't help himself. Being angry at the situation alone would not improve things in the slightest. He might as well be angry at a person. Time to inflict all the emotion back on the one that caused him to feel so much.

The noise ebbs slightly, leaving shuddering breaths. Idly, he wonders about hyperventilation, and what he'd do to help without anything but a stethoscope and a few old bits of equipment. It doesn't seem wise to advise her to breathe normally, especially after he'd just sat and watched her hurting without moving a muscle.

Brushing herself down, she stands up slowly, making her way over to the box in the corner spewing with reds and golds and greens. She produces the dust-ridden decorations, pulling them out for inspection. She sniffs, rubbing at her already-blotchy face, then drapes some tinsel over the railing in the corner.

'What are you doing?' He asks finally, frowning.

'Dickhead.' She curses softly to herself, continuing to decorate the little room.

Ethan quietens, acknowledging he deserves it. As she works, he watches, pinning up wreaths and holly. Admittedly, it's looking good, but she always does a good job of decorations. Some mistletoe lies across her palms. Both breathe in sharply. It gets pinned up anyway with the last remaining bit of blu-tac.

One last item is held up - a murky bottle, containing spirits of sorts. Alicia inspects the label meticulously, giving a shrug after a while. Her eyes are wide.

He shakes his head. 'No.'

She opens the lid, sniffing it. Giving a lengthy sigh, he stands up, snatching the bottle off her and tipping it upside down.

'Don't be stupid.'

'I'm thirsty.' She whines softly, falling back to the floor, miserable.

'I know.' He agrees, sitting next to her. 'And cold?'

Morose and defeated, Alicia nods, dropping the front of anger. 'Yeah.'

Ethan wraps an arm round her shoulder, huddling in. It is weird, but they have no real alternate option. The temperature has lowered significantly. Snow is in the forecast, so this isn't a huge surprise. They are cold, colder than cold.

'I didn't know how.' He tells her finally, breaking the silence.

'How what?'

'How to stop you from crying,' He sighs, holding her tighter. 'Of course it hurt me to see you like that. It was like I froze.'

Eyes shiny, she looked up. 'You've never lacked compassion, not once, yet you wouldn't connect with me then.'

' _Couldn't_ , not wouldn't.' He corrects, rubbing her arm to soothe. 'I didn't mean to scare you. 'I got carried away, I suppose it's just... all that pent up emotion, I-I...'

'I get it. Why you though? Out of all people, why am I stuck with you? Everywhere I get trapped, it's bloody you. Like the universe is trying to tell me something.'

'Why not me, eh?' He replied, nudging her. 'We always get thrown together. It is like fate, if fate were real.'

'I believe it is.' She answers. 'Fate can move mountains, but bring a shovel.'

He pauses. 'Thought that was faith?'

'Oh yeah.' She giggles lightly, causing hiccups, picking at a loose thread on her top. 'I believe in faith then.'

'Can you believe in faith?' He asks, puzzled. 'Is that possible?'

'Course.' She replies. 'You can believe in anything.'

He laughs. She laughs too, blissfully unaware that she's fully missed the point. Blonde forever, but at least with good intentions.

'I would've had you down for a believer of all sorts.' She says.

'I did, till all those who loved me died or left. Where is God then? We're surrounded by suffering, Alicia, loads of poorly people. They're in this state because something terrible has happened to them, be it internal illness or an accident. Why? Innocent lives, and God just lets it happen. I happen to think he's a bit of a tool, actually.'

'Maybe there's some plan that none of us are capable of understanding though.' She says, brushing her hair out of her face with a hand. 'You never know.'

He looks at her dubiously. 'Jesus probably once did exist, and I'm sure he was a good person. I can think of many admirable people, all of whom don't have a way of life dedicated to them. It's a social construct to control the masses, if you ask me.'

'No no, I agree, I'm totally impartial, just playing devil's advocate. I recently dealt with a patient who didn't want their child having a blood transfusion, because it wasn't what God wanted. It tried to explain we were surrounded by sick people, and that God put me as a doctor there to help, but she wasn't convinced like. Her daughter was only about four. The father had an expression like he agreed with me but didn't want to contradict the values of the mother. Treated her in the end, but... mental.'

Ethan thinks for a while, then exhales slowly. 'Nobody does prepare you for the demands of the job, do they?'

'No, not at all.' Alicia agrees.

'I feel it dreadful to deviate from the Hippocratic Oath, and this is for your ears only, but some people are _so_ infuriatingly wrong. It is testing, even for the most patient of us.'

'You are entitled to think whatever you like. Don't worry, I won't tell,' She replies quietly. 'I'd have to find someone first.'

They both laugh, in spite of the situation. The weak light that the dodgy bulbs offer make the situation incredibly more bearable, and although it's far from cosy, they definitely help to make it a little less scary. Even though they're trapped, it well and truly feels like Christmas.

'The decorations look good, can't say there's much point in having them up though.' He gestures to the walls.

'You said we'd be down here hours,' She reminds him ruefully.

'Since when am I right about anything? We need to warm up though, it's awfully cold.'

'Let's dance.' She suggests, standing up and taking a hand. Reluctantly, his fingers curled back round hers.

' _Dance_?'

'Yeah. It's Christmas.'

'Does that automatically mean dancing then?' He asks, although it quite obviously does.

'Of course, a drop of alcohol would have made it more fun.'

'It would have made you poorly. It's probably been here longer than Charlie's been in his job.' His voice is gentle yet firm, adopting the tone he used on stubborn patients.

'Drama queen.' She rolls her eyes. 'You can still dance with me, though, right?'

'How could I possibly refuse? I'm not light on my feet though.'

'So you say. You weren't bad last time, if my memory serves me.' She widens her eyes.

They start to move carefully, swaying from side to side.

'The only thing that would trump this would be your melodic rendition of deck the halls.' He says.

She chuckles. 'You'll regret saying that.'

He pauses, heightening their awareness of the proximity acutely. 'I won't.'

They stare for a couple of seconds, eyes boring into the other curiously.

'Your singing is lovely.' He says, tilting his head slightly. 'When you do it properly.'

'A thrill of hope, the weary world rejoices-' She starts as a joke, cheeks pinkening.

His eyes are warm and encouraging, and he's guiding them carefully to continue to sway. She sings softly, quietly, as if anyone else could hear anyway. It's for his benefit solely, and doing so puts her in a vulnerable position. Bursting into song would be silly in any other circumstance, but it's the right time of year, and there is nothing else to do. They forget the cold.

'I'm sorry to break you off,' He looks amused, which causes her to turn round. 'You've put a considerable dent in that door over there.'

'Good,' She mutters back darkly. 'It hurt my foot enough.'

'Not sure the door was strictly to blame for that.' He smiles, eyes landing back on hers.

'How long d'you think we've been down here now?' She asks.

Ethan looks blank. 'I'd say long enough. Those mascara trails are engraved into your skin, put it that way.'

'I bet I look a state,' She moans.

'Who cares?' He replies cheekily. 'Only me here to see.'

Alicia uses the hand that was resting on his chest to hit him, hard. A comment like that was only made because he couldn't resist an opportunity to tease. She averts his eyes, looking back to their feet. The worn, breathable trainers suddenly felt like a curse; chilly toes weren't a nice.

To get her attention back, he lifts her chin deftly. A thumb gently wipes one cheek, then moves to wipe the other. 'Still _every bit_ as beautiful.'

In disguise of her embarrassment, she glances upward, eyeing the mistletoe. He removes his glasses as subtly as possible, but it causes her to look and furrow her brow.

'One of the many downsides of being spectacle-clad is that there's no exciting, impromptu moments. Ever.' He explains, attaching them to his shirt.

'Who says spontaneity is sexy anyway?'

'Alicia Munroe, can I have this moment?' He asks. 'Might as well make a song and dance out of it, pardon the pun, you knew it was happening anyway.'

'I had no idea.' She shakes her head. 'Asking is so cute though.'

He gives a withering sigh and leans in, quietening her giggles.

'Not like you didn't plan this anyway when we both know you dithered over putting it up.' Ethan raises an eyebrow.

'I put it up for stylistic purposes, you guided us under it.' She points out.

'You're all about passing the blame tonight, aren't you?'

Her head lolls onto his shoulder, predictably avoiding an answer.

'Merry Christmas Nibbles.'

'Merry Christmas, my love.' He whispers back.

They don't notice Elle open the door, smile to herself and creep back out, leaving it propped open.

Both completely unaware they'd been rescued, not caring to be now they'd finally found magic again.


End file.
